Thursday, February 27, 2003

 

2/27/03 (Cont'd.)

I juss made a complete ass of myself...
How so? I juss explained to 2 girls why I've been calling all females pirates.
They've both seemed annoyed with me lately.
I've juss realized what an idiot I am.
It's fun being me!

And now, a little story...

=-=-=

She sits there in front of the computer. Winamp is blazing music while kazaa is running, downloading songs for 'previewing.'
AIM has been on for an hour and 56 minutes. She has about 12 IMs up right now. 4 she is attentively responding to. The other 8 she has forgotten in the midst of her flirtatious conversation.
The 4 confabulations dividing between 3 boys and 1 girl. The girl, her best friend, is interestingly gathering tidbits from her about the 3 boys she's conversing with.
"You're one lucky girl. I'd do anything to even have a chance with these boys. You have these 3 living on your door-step!"
She knew it was true. Though, she was modest and denied her appeal to everyone who brought up the subject. She also knew of the 3 lucky male's appeal to the school's female population. However, she wasn't in it for superficial reasons. She honestly wanted an affectionate relationship.
She had never been held that way before. She longed for a knee-popping kiss. She always wanted to fall asleep in the arms of someone while watching some of her favorite movies.
She knew the 3 boys well. All their ups; all their downs. The way they acted. What they found funny. But she was at a lost. She realized that she couldn't live with herself if she crossed that barrier. They were great guys....she just....couldn't.
She was down as ever. Once again, she messed up. Every time she finds a potential, something goes wrong. Whether it be them not feeling for her in the same way or vice versa. Or her realizing some fallacy about the male in mind. Whatever it was, there was always something. And she hated herself for being too picky, too patient and the epitomy of a procrastinator.
As she said her goodbyes and farewells to everyone, she came across one particular message in the fray of her taskbar that had been flashing for, what must of been, the past half hour. Her countenence brightened as she felt a new wave of jubilation.
And she added to that list of few a new name. Next to it, a special bullet:
"·He always says G*night, G*night."

=-=-=

I'm out.
-Ryan

Ryan posted this at 10:55 PM.